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Is your baby spoiled?

Is your baby spoiled?

Question:

- My boy of 1 year and almost 3 months hits himself with the head of the door or walls in protest against the restrictions imposed by us, sometimes rolls on the floor. What behavior should we adopt in order to teach him about such self-defeating practices. I mention that we usually quarrel or leave him alone.

Answer:



Dear mom,
Summarizing me to the data you sent I would say that your boy is very spoiled. From the first years of life, children know exactly who and what allows them to do certain things.
Adults have their own principles in life, temperaments, attitudes, towards everything around us, different ways of reacting. These can be found in the way we act, discuss, educate or play with our children. Even small children react differently, depending on the people they come into contact with.
Through their structure they seek to satisfy their desires as quickly as possible. We, the adult parents, in our vast majority, give in to the wishes of the child. The more often I get what I want, the less the authority of the parents decreases.
From your letter, mamico, I have kept in mind that the little one makes scenes only when a wish is not fulfilled.
1. First and foremost, you should set clear rules that all family members must adhere to. The rules are imposed by their repetition, calmly and firmly.
2. No one is allowed to find mitigating circumstances for non-observance of a rule, it is not for the decisions made.
3. One parent never contradicts the other in front of the child, if he or she disagrees with the child's decision.
4. The more the child grows, the more he will be treated as such, being considered more and more responsible.
5. Do not choose the variant of threats and do not raise the tone: you can only create inhibitions.
6. You will explain to the child, in a safe and calm tone, why it cannot happen now what he wants.
7. When you talk to him you look him directly in the eye, he does not turn his head, avoiding his eyes.
8. Be confident in what you ask the child and in compliance with the rules.
9. Don't confuse firmness with aggressiveness.
10. Don't forget about the system of rewards and punishments.
Anamaria Mihai
Psychologist - Specialist Clinician
NICOLE Medical Diagnosis and Treatment Center